- June 2023
Rep. George Santos fought to keep secret the identities of those who guaranteed the $500,000 bail bond on which the indicted Republican was released last month. Santos lost that battle, and this week we learned the sureties were his father and his aunt.
And here I thought the Santos backers would turn out to be Ursula and Maleficent.
George Santos says he'll go to jail before revealing the names of whoever posted his $500K bond. In jail George would:
- Ask to see the manager
- Refer to the prison yard as "the lanai"
- Wear the collar of his jumpsuit up
- Call his cellmate his assistant
- Claim he's in Paris
- May 2023
- April 2023
Today the House passed a bill banning transgender girls and women from competing in female school athletics. Every Republican voted for the "Protection of Women and Girls in Sports Act," while every Democrat voted against this culture-war gift to conservatives.
Yesterday the Florida Board of Education voted to expand the state's Don't Say Gay law. The ban on classroom instruction about sexual orientation and gender identity that had applied to kindergarden through third grade will now extend clear up to senior year in high school.
But don't despair! On Monday an openly gay congressman announced that he's running for re-election.
Okay, the congressman was George Santos.
I'll allow you 15 minutes of despair.
- March 2023
The AP recently ran a story about Rep. George Santos and truth. As you know, the two have never met.
"Perhaps not since Donald Trump launched his presidency with exaggerated claims of the crowd size at his inauguration has an elected official arrived in Washington and sought so brazenly and defiantly to convince the public of reality different than the one before their very eyes," noted the story.
Just what America needs—a gay man copying one of the worst Trump traits. Normally when a gay man emulates a famous person, it's in the form of drag, as God intended.
We're in a "post-truth" period. "What I see in the post-truth era is not just that people are lying or lying more, it’s that they’re lying with a political purpose," said one expert. "The really scary part is getting away with it."
Apparently Santos expects to. The professional conman has filed paperwork for a possible reelection bid, and I apologize if I just upset your stomach.
Santos was asked about the idea of a post-truth era, and he responded, "I think truth still matters very much."
His nose didn't grow three feet, and lightning didn't strike him. No, it was MY head that exploded.
If you got the chance to say two words to gay serial liar Rep. George Santos, what would they be?
- February 2023
You might be of the opinion by now that I'm obsessed with George Santos.
You'd be right.
The gay Congressman from Long Island is so outrageous a liar that he must be the love child of Donald Trump and Lance Armstrong. Santos appalls and fascinates me. But mostly appalls.
When I heard an NPR story about the serial fabulist begin on my way to work yesterday, I turned up the radio.
His fellow Republicans want Santos to keep a low profile while he's the subject of investigations, but Santos isn't having it. "He actually seems to be leveraging his notoriety, appearing on conservative news outlets and trolling other Republicans on social media," said reporter Brian Mann.
Santos is a chip off the old blockhead, according to political expert David Wasserman. "Donald Trump realized shamelessness can pay off politically. We've seen others follow in his footsteps. Now, of course, this is to an unprecedented degree."
Santos clearly believes you can't have too much of a bad thing.
Wasserman said, "His ability to stay in the news and draw attention to himself is really the only thing he has left."
Which means Santos will soon be vying with Marjorie Taylor Greene for biggest congressional chimpanzee.
Like Santos, Becca Balint is new to Congress and gay. But the similarities end there. The Vermont Democrat is livid: "As a proud member of the LGBTQ community, outraged that he lied about the Pulse nightclub shooting—as the granddaughter of someone killed in the Holocaust, outraged that he used that to get elected."
Do you think there's any chance Santos could turn out to be just gay-ish?
Rep. Nick Lalota, a Republican from Santos's neighboring district, called Santos "a sociopath." Republican Rep. Nancy Mace of South Carolina, joking at the Washington Press Club dinner about the GOP's Santos problem, cracked, "There hasn't been a Republican that's gotten this much buzz since Lauren Boebert went through a metal detector."
To expel Santos from office requires a two-thirds vote from House members, and reporter Mann said that's unlikely. We're facing the possibility that Santos will serve out his two-year term. Two years of grabbing the spotlight. Two years of constant lies.
By then he should be presidential material.
Rep. George Santos said in an interview yesterday that, following his tense exchange with Sen. Mitt Romney prior to Tuesday's State of the Union, Sen. Kyrsten Sinema told the New York Republican to "hang in there, buddy."
Sinema's spokesperson declared that "a lie." The two lawmakers never spoke.
Having lied his way into Congress, Santos has apparently decided to stick with fibbing as a strategy. He gives new meaning to making your bed and lying in it.
News outlets are reporting that U.S. fighter aircraft shot down the Chinese surveillance balloon off the Atlantic coast today.
What really happened is George Santos piloted Air Force One to Myrtle Beach, lassoed a whale to carry him out to sea, fired the shoulder-mounted missile launcher he made out of oyster shells and seaweed, and returned to D.C. in time to serve dinner to the homeless.
I do wish the media would tell the truth.
- January 2023
The former boyfriend of George Santos told CNN it was no surprise to him that Santos got himself elected to Congress. "What he always looked for was fame and power," said Pedro Vilarva. "That's all he cared about and he got it."
Despite the plethora of calls for the Long Island Republican to resign over his exhaustive lying, Santos will stay put, his ex firmly believes. "His ego is too big," said Vilarva.
Fame. Power. Lies. Ego. Republican. Good Lord, George Santos is Donald Trump's Mini-Me.
I've held out hope that George Santos isn't actually gay. He lied about everything on his way to becoming a congressman from New York, so why not that?
Today I read that Brazilian prosecutors are pursuing fraud charges against Santos, who admitted to stealing a man's checkbook, which had been in the possession of Santos's mother, in 2008. According to CNN, Santos used the checkbook "to purchase clothing and shoes."
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