Entries from words

  • January 2023
  • Image by Maicon Fonseca Zanco from Pixabay 

    The Les You Know

    My name is Leslie, and recently my brother-in-law asked me whether I preferred it pronounced "Less-lie" or "Lezz-lie."

    I responded that when I was young I had some concern about "Lezz-lie," lest I be connected with the word lesbian. But then I turned out to be one, so I'm well passed that unease.

    I added the remarkable fact that, of the four girls named Leslie in my high school class, three of us turned out to be lesbians.

    With impressive comic timing, my adult niece sang out, "So it really was the parents' fault!"

  • November 2022
  • September 2022
  • Image:  Facebook

    Occupational Hazard

    I want to acknowledge the passing today of Queen Elizabeth II, since she was a worldwide figure for so long and I held her in some esteem.

    But I swear to God, every sentence I come up with using the word "queen" sounds gayer than the next.

  • August 2022
  • Image by Arno Richter from Pixabay 

    What If?

    Sappho, as you likely know, was an ancient Greek poet who wrote of her attraction to women. It's because Sappho hailed from the island of Lesbos that we have the word lesbian.

    I found myself wondering today what women-loving-women would be called if Sappho had been born on a different Greek island. If she'd lived on Mykonos, we'd be Mykonians. If she'd lived on Rhodes, we'd be Rhodians. If she'd lived on Crete, we'd be . . . Cretins?

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    Image:  Wikipedia

    This Week's Quote

    LADY BRACKNELL:  This noise is extremely unpleasant. It sounds as if he was having an argument. I dislike arguments of any kind. They are always vulgar, and often convincing.

    Oscar Wilde

    Source:  The Importance of Being Earnest

  • Image by SeaReeds from Pixabay 

    Birds of a Feather

    I was reading how zookeepers at an English zoo successfully gave two gay male flamingos an abandoned egg to hatch and raise, when I stumbled upon something that'll change my life.

    A group of flamingos is called a flamboyance.

    Queer humor writers don't get gifts like that every day.

  • Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay 

    Today's Adventure

    A couple of hours ago, I got out of my car to pump gas at a station just beyond Seattle. As I lifted the nozzle, a vehicle nearby honked and I jerked my head up. I saw a car pull up on the other side of my pump; the driver was an older Asian woman. Behind her car was the pick-up that had honked at her.

    A middle-aged white man got out of the truck, saying something that ended with "supposed to pull up, stupid!"

    I jumped in immediately, offering a sarcastic, "You're a charmer." He replied, "Thanks."

    There was no more bravado, as he carefully avoided my gaze for the duration. I don't know whether the woman was aware of any of this. She pumped her gas, and I dilly-dallied by using the squeegee on my windows.

    They certainly needed it.

    All I knew in that moment was, if this fella intended to Asian-bash, I was going to make it very hard for him.

    Eventually they both pulled away, so I did, too. Later, as the adrenaline evaporated, I wondered if I'd done the wrong thing. My automatic instinct was to protect the woman, but I'd run the risk of escalating things by putting him down. Could I have defused the situation in some way? Further, he might've been armed or insane. Or armed AND insane.

    It's so hard to know what to do when an ugly incident breaks out in front of you. At least on this occasion the woman departed unscathed, the man was put on notice and my windows are cleaner than they've been all summer.

  • Image:  Facebook

    Dazzled

    Periodically I receive in my mailbox that blue envelope that's full of coupons for area businesses, ranging from vinyl siding to restaurants.

    One of the recent Valpak offerings made my eyes bug out. Across the top of the ad for a business called Dazzle, a banner blared "The Gayest Cleaning Company in America!"

    Wow. Using gayness as a selling point. Only in Seattle.

    The second letter in "Dazzle" was stylized into a house—with vertical rainbow stripes. On the back of the ad, a dog wearing a scarf and oversized sunglasses, holding a glass of champagne and colorful shopping bags, didn't exactly suggest cleaning, so I guess that was another gay reference.

    I realized I'd automatically gone into decoding mode while looking over the insert. I wouldn't have thought twice about the phrasing for any other cleaning company's ad. But I thought several times about Dazzle's offer of a discount for deluxe cleaning that promised to be "top to bottom."

  • June 2022
  • Image by Robin Higgins from Pixabay 

    It Sings

    My new favorite phrase is "an apparently inebriated Rudy Giuliani."

  • April 2022
  • Image:  Facebook

    Alley Cats

    I got an email from the local chapter of the Human Rights Campaign inviting me to participate in a bowling fundraiser. The event is billed as "HRC Seattle's 18th Annual Bowling for Equality:  No Time to Spare."

    Now I can't help wondering whether it's called that every year, or did the chapter set itself the task of coming up with a different bowling pun annually?

    I hope not. All I can think of is "Keep Your Mind Out of the Gutter."

  • October 2021

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