Humor about all things LGBTQ

  • June 2023
  • Image:  Maggie Mcelroy-jackson


    What do you call a small Pride? A Minipride? A Pridelet?

    At any rate, I attended one today in the small Washington city where I live. Shoreline, which shares a border with Seattle, held its first annual Pride celebration, grafting it onto a regularly occurring farmers market.

    Pride with vegetables.

    In one corner of what's normally a park and ride, the local arts organization invited folks to make rainbow penny spinners. Nearby was a selfie station. I stood in front of the Pride-flag backdrop, clutching a small Pride flag and a rainbow fan that were being enthusiastically distributed, so my friend Maggie could take a photo of me fully rainbowed.

    Especially compared to Seattle's ginormous yearly celebration, this was altogether a fraction-sized Pride—which is totally beside the point. In this era of rabid national anti-LGBTQ sentiment, I'm happy to support any municipality, let alone my own, that makes a point of celebrating us rather than denigrating us.

    And now I know where to find 30 kinds of lettuce.

  • Image:  Facebook

    First Thought

    When I heard that Pat Robertson had died, I immediately imagined him meeting up with Jerry Falwell again and remarking, "Boy, it really is hot here."

  • Image:  Facebook

    This Week's Quote

    George Santos says he'll go to jail before revealing the names of whoever posted his $500K bond. In jail George would:

    - Ask to see the manager

    - Refer to the prison yard as "the lanai"

    - Wear the collar of his jumpsuit up

    - Call his cellmate his assistant

    - Claim he's in Paris

    Paul Rudnick

    Source: Twitter

  • Image:  Facebook

    School Daze

    During a CNN town hall over the weekend, Republican presidential candidate Nikki Haley actually linked teen girls' suicidal ideation with transgender girls being in locker rooms.

    "How are we supposed to get our girls used to the fact that biological boys are in their locker room? And then they wonder why a third of our teenage girls seriously contemplated suicide last year," she said.

    That's nothing. When a lunch lady loses her hair net in the mac and cheese, all the teenage girls want to commit suicide.

  • Image:  Facebook

    Getting the Story Straight

    Something occurred to me concerning the folks who are so riled up over Drag Queen Story Hour:  Why haven't they offered to read to children themselves?

    Many an embittered queer would answer, Because they can't read. But I know that isn't true, and I think these stalwarts of family values are ignoring a great opportunity.

    Just think how kids would react as red-blooded American males manfully read aloud from such classics as "Harold and the Non-Gay Purple Crayon," "Uncurious George," "Where the Wild Things Better Not Be" and "Horton Hears a Howitzer!"

  • Bam

  • May 2023
  • Image by Raka C. from Pixabay

    This Week's Quote

    My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.

    Margaret Cho

    Source:  Brainyquote

  • Image by ndemello from Pixabay

    Ex-Gays Haven't Exited

    I've written a humorous memoir called "Fun With Fred:  Life With OCD and Hoarding." Since May is Mental Health Awareness Month, I penned an op-ed for LGBTQ newspapers around the country, in large part to publicize the book.

    One unexpected result? I learned ex-gays haven't gone the way of the dodo.

    Because of how far society has evolved over the last decades, and because ex-gay leaders have a habit of getting caught in flagrante gayo, I thought there weren't many ex-gays about anymore. That might be true, but now I know some of them are still proselytizing.

    Something dodos were never guilty of.

    I received a message from a certain Sharon Kass, telling me she'd read my piece in the Washington Blade. "I do activism for ex-LGBTQ rights," she wrote. "Half a century of 'equality' propaganda doesn't change the truth--that the psychological disorders in question are preventable with better parenting and treatable with depth psychotherapy from a properly trained practitioner."

    It took me a minute to realize "the psychological disorders in question" weren't actually the ones I'd written about, which was a real shame, because if she had solutions for OCD and hoarding, I was all ears.

    No, to her, queerness is a psychological disorder, and she urged me to "get help" for myself, and listed several books and resources, including an interview with Joseph Nicolosi, the late but still odious driver of conversion therapy.

    Kass closed with, "In spite of everything, the truth will out. The people will see to that."

    These "people" ARE dodos. Imagine living your life contrary to your nature, and putting all your energy into trying to convince others to do the same. It's a twisted existence.

    One that Kass has been dutifully living for quite a while, I discovered. A decade ago, hosted a petition describing her as "an infamous, prolifically anti-gay hate mail writer who targets gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender journalists, bloggers and activists for e-bullying with reparative therapy claims and threats of 'civil war.'"

    I guess I should be honored that Kass finally got around to me. Or wounded that it took her so long.

  • Image:  Facebook

    This Week's Quote

    Our beloved #TinaTurner has died. From #Nutbush to the top, she was an absolutely brilliant performer and inspiration to us all. May flights of angels sing her to her rest, but if I know Tina, she is singing lead.

    Bette Midler

    Source:  Twitter

  • Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay 

    The Powers That Be

    Emboldened by last year's Supreme Court decision allowing a high school football coach to pray with his players, Christian conservatives around the nation are looking to shred the line between church and state.

    But everything is bigger in Texas, where a solid handful of religion bills passed by the Texas Senate are enough to make you reach for the holy water.

    A bill to require that the Ten Commandments be posted in every classroom is getting attention, but it's another offering that indicates to me we have a problem of biblical proportions.

    According to The Washington Post, one bill "would allow uncertified chaplains to replace trained, professional counselors in K-12 school."

    Jesus H. Christ, you know what that means. A kid divulges he's gay, and is informed he's headed to hell. Another kid wonders if they're trans, and the chaplain goes straight to their parents. A girl confesses to liking another girl, and is instructed to wear skirts and quit softball.

    So many queer adults were shunned, abused and vilified as young people by Christian churches. We know what harm this bill would cause.

    Gird your loins. No, I'm not suggesting we go to war and slay 1,000 with the jawbone of an ass. I'm suggesting we call out some boneheads and asses.

  • Image:  Facebook

    Drama Queen

    As a Seattle Storm fan, I've been spoiled. The team has won four championships since 2004. But the Storm's season opener on Saturday made it clear my team is going to be mediocre or worse this year.

    I find myself reacting in two extreme ways. Sometimes I swear a blue streak. And sometimes, with the back of my hand delicately pressed to my forehead, I peer about for an antique divan I can swoon upon, ashen but ravishing thanks to an instant case of consumption.

  • Image:  Facebook


    This week Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis signed bills in front of a cheering crowd at the evangelical Cambridge Christian School in Tampa.

    I guess that's the best place to be when you're signing bills that will ban gender-affirming care for minors, force trans people to use the wrong bathroom, expand the Don't Say Gay law and target drag shows.

    In the early days of Christianity, Christians were thrown to the lions. Now DeSantis is throwing LGBTQ people to the Christians.

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